You’re cute and all that, but I don’t know what to do with you.
A MISERABLE PILE OF SECRETS
I’d get all excited and start looking for the things I’ve managed to lose! (Maybe even the things I know others have lost, hah.) I’d take photos too, because I’m sure it’d be amazing, an amazing pile of people’s precious junk.
A duel to the death. Or legal action.
That’s so impersonal. Not that I think every person is ~*~*special*~*~, but I think strangers aren’t as flat as ‘NPC’ connotes. Unlike NPCs, you can get to know some strangers.